Highlight: I got a flat tire on the way to the date, ended up taking an Uber, and then drinking way too much to get through the evening. She told me she’d been gay her whole life but married a man for 14 years as she felt it would be hard to be “out” and be a high school teacher. Marianne: High school gym teacher, no kids, divorced from a man, lesbianīackstory: Though she wore a dress and had long hair in her profile picture, Marianne turned out to be very butch, wearing a ponytail and gym outfit to the date. I felt she was just flirting with the “idea” of being gay, whereas I am GAY.įollow up: She apologized for being an ass. How it ended: I started to cry in front of her – like REALLY cry – after realizing how disheartening it is to date a bi-curious woman. Highlight: One of the first things out of her mouth was “So I went down on this guy last week and he didn’t reciprocate … what do you think was wrong?” She then proceeded to tell me about other dates with men and women, and then mentioned the (male) bouncer at Cubbyhole had asked her out! Mary: Jazz singer, one 8-year-old son, divorced from a man, bisexualīackstory: A newbie to the queer scene, Mary told me she’s just starting to date again after her divorce and is dating men and women. So here is the low down … Date One: The Newly Divorced Explorer I also was clear on my profile that I’m divorced, have two kids, and am very gay. Unlike my previous dating strategy involving dozens of messages, then texts, then phone calls and video chats before meeting – I decided to get right to “IRL” within a few “in app” messages, after, of course, assessing they were age appropriate (late 30’s to early ’50s), generally my type (lipstick or nerdy femme), single, queer, had a job, and generally geographically desirable. So, I updated my profiles on Hinge, Tinder, and Bumble, added a new profile on Facebook dating, and began a marathon of swiping. The perfect two-week window arrived when my kids went to sleepaway camp in July. I wasn’t so sure, but after a year of monthly (awkward) Zoom dates, mixed in with some freezing outdoor dates (and no sex!), I decided to give “volume” a try! I live half an hour from New York City and arranged my settings so that I’d see women within about an hour’s drive. Where Elizabeth’s Lesbian Dating Story Beginsĭating is a numbers game, right? That’s what we are told. Dating is a numbers game and being open to all different types of women can be game changing for our later in life community.
I asked her to write this piece for my blog. Elizabeth and I are good friends and she regaled me late summer with her tales of the lesbian dating scene.